Who owns your happiness?

Mom & Dad's place in
Penticton B.C.

My mom sent me a link this week to Life Lift, the Oprah Blog. The link she sent was about  teaching your brain to be happy through meditation.  I do not currently meditate, but have always been interested in starting. At the end of my Pilate's classes (time permitting) I guide my clients through a relaxation exercise where I have everyone lay still on their backs, eyes closed, focus on their breathing and then slowly work from head to toe relaxing each and every muscle. It always amazes me how I feel better at the end of the exercise, even though I was guiding them and not participating. I guess this could be considered a form of meditation?


The mind is an amazing force and I starting thinking about my happiness. Often times I blame others for steeling my happiness or being a road block to me feeling happy, but now after reading this blog and researching a bit - turns out I am in control of my happiness. It is my choice to allow others to influence my state of mind and I have the power to develop my own happiness. Wow! What a concept! So I am adding, Learn to Meditate to my goals list, starting with Mindfulness of Breathing meditation that I found through my research. I see this as starting point to finding my life balance. 


The more I read and linked from one blog to the next on the subject I wondered, what makes me happy? The answers to this question came to me quickly. My family came to mind first, my friends - all make me laugh and I feel happy when I am with them.  Teaching Pilate's and participating, I love the positive energy in the studio. Then things came to mind that I don't do anymore like dancing (not in a formal disciplined manner), painting, drawing... and why don't I do those things? The answer...Time! But is time really the answer or an excuse? Hmm... I don't know. This is one I am going to have to think about and report back. That Oprah...always making you think and stuff!  ;) 

I'm a lucky lady!

What a wonderful weekend I had, as I had expected! I am a very lucky lady. First, I have a beautiful group of girlfriends - both outside and in. I enjoyed a relaxing weekend with Jenn (our hostess), Robin, Renee and Tara up at Port Bruce. Second, I am lucky because I have a husband that not only is supportive, but is fully capable of and enjoys being on his own for the weekend with our girls. I know there are women out there that cannot get away because they do not have that kind of support and confidence in their partner. I am truly grateful!


To most our weekend would probably appear boring - but to 5 busy moms, it was heaven. We took care of each other, each time one of us got up, the rest benefited either with a snack or fresh drink. Majority of our time was spent sitting and chatting - we all agree that we could be together for 4 weeks straight and not run out of topics. Our weekend together was so good for our minds and souls, we make each other laugh and feel good about ourselves. As my mime (grandmother) always used to say - "it's good to laugh!"


We drank (moderately) and enjoyed treats, but I do not feel like I completely abandoned my health goals. It was a well balanced weekend. Our snacks were not the healthiest - but our meals were. We walked each day, and with each walk had to battle a very steep hill to get back to the cottage. Walk  1 - I could not talk as I struggled up the hill feeling the weight of gravity pulling me back down. By our 4th trek up the hill on Sunday, I was starting to feel my stride and able to get out more than one word answers as we walked and talked. It felt so good, each time I made it to the top was a victory! It also really reinforced my need to up my cardio - get my hart rate up regularly. So - I am carrying over my goal from last week, to get out and walk 3x this week - now that I've jump started my cardio over the weekend.


Thank you my girls for another great weekend!

Everyone needs a little Me Time

Well my goals for this week will have to carry over into next week. I lost Tuesday, I was sick as a dog and spent the day in bed. Not sure if it was the Green Machine smoothie or the slightly pink chicken for dinner Monday night. Either way, my day in bed threw off my week. But I am not fretting about it - not one bit. This is life! 


This weekend I am heading off to my friends cottage for a girls weekend! There is nothing like a weekend with your girlfriends. We all take care of each other, eat well, laugh a lot and even get in some exercise. Every year we plan to do Pilate's outside  and just don't get to it, too busy relaxing.  Hopefully this year we will be able to fit it in. 


That is one thing I have come to appreciate, as a parent & spouse, we need to make time for ourselves. I used to feel guilty going away on my own and hurt when Troy wanted to hang out with the guys, not anymore.  When I take time for me, I feel better and that makes me a better mom/wife. I love my family - they don't stress me out and I enjoy being with them. My husband is my partner and shares the load around the house. Kayla is like another set of adult hands and Isabel is hilarious, we call her our little stress reliever. The appeal of my girls get-a-way is not to escape my home life, rather recharge my batteries!


Hope you all find a little "Me Time" this weekend! 

Not a fan of the "Green Machine"

Monday afternoon I was hungry and looking for something nutritious, that would not fill me up too much since it was 3pm. So I stopped at Williams Coffee Pub. Right when I walked in the door was an ad for  their new Green Machine Smoothie. The ad boasts "real ingredients" of fresh baby spinach, avocado, coconut water, kale and organic blue agave. So I went for it - even though the gal at the counter was not exactly talking it up. I did not like it. It tastes like avocado and bitter grass. I brought it home and added frozen strawberries to it which helped cut the bitter grass taste, but after I finished it I felt like I had indigestion. Disappointing, I thought I had found a great solution to a convent healthy options when I am out and about. 

My goals this week

My plan for this week is to eat more during the day to keep my energy up and get in a walk each day, either before work or after dinner with Troy or Kayla. I'm only booked into 1 Pilate's class this week, so I am going to have to be more disciplined and work out on my own. It is so much easier when I have my workout scheduled with someone - then I am accountable. It's booked - I have to go... so I guess this week I am accountable to you, my blog reading public!


So far I am off to a good start, I woke up this morning before my alarm went off (I love that!!) and gave Troy a loving nudge. While he got dressed I let out the dog and put on the coffee for our return. When I ran back upstairs to get my socks, Isabel (our 7 yr old) was in the hall way all dressed. So I told her that we were going for a walk to which she replied - "ya I know, I'm coming with you." 


What a lovely way to start our day! The neighbourhood was so quiet and a bit heavy with fog. The temperature was just right - not yet muggy. I did not walk to the pace I had hoped, but we had fun and that is what life is all about!

Raising the bar on my goals

From the very beginning of this journey I committed to doing this slowly so that the changes I make become part of my life style. The other day someone asked me what am I finding to be the most difficult part of these changes. Without thinking I said eating. I still struggle with dinner ideas to please everyone and I am not preparing my lunches as I had planned. My struggle is not making healthy food choices more with seeing meals as a chore!


Today I've been thinking about this and how am I going to solve this problem? My solution; to get my daughters involved in planning our meals for next week. Troy is so easy going, he will eat anything I make - even if it does not taste great! He's usually the chief in the house and I don't think he wants to discourage me from cooking when I do. 


So, on Saturday afternoon, hopefully by the pool, I plan to get out the lap top and plan out our week as a team. I have a few sources picked out. One is http://www.skinnytaste.com/,  recommended by Stacey one of our clients at Create Balance. The other is Looneyspoons, from the sister team Janet & Greta who take everyday favourites and make them healthier. This will get us started - I would love to hear of any other great sources out there for family friendly healthy recipes!

STRESS - another contributor to weight gain

I have been talking a lot lately about dealing with work stresses and how it effects my ability to simply be healthy. Everyone has their own coping mechanisms for stress, some eat, some drink, some smoke, some clean, some exercise... me I tend to shut down, turn in-ward and not eat well.  


When under stress our body's go into defence mode to deal with the stresses, the fight or flight effect. Your heart rate rises, hormones are released etc and how we respond will determine how the stress effects our health. I am not an expert, this info has been provided to me from several sources, including Krista Dolbear (holistic nutritionist). 


Those who deal with stress through exercise support the body in coping with the stress and recover. Exercise helps decrease the "stress hormones", increases endorphins that make you feel good (runners high) and helps distract you from your stresses and in my case - helps me think more clearly to work out the problem causing the stress. 


It is interesting how once you start looking at your life from the perspective of improving your health and well being, all of the negative in your life seems to come to the service. To truly feel good and be balanced you have to work on every aspect of your life and this takes some work. Those who look like they've got it all together either don't really or they work at it. Me, I'm realizing I've got some work to do!

Skipping Meals - 1 of 9 Contributors of Weight Gain

Krista (click here for Krista's website) provided me with a sheet outlining the 9 Contributors to Weight Gain. Number 3 on the sheet is one of my big issues - SKIPPING MEALS.  Why is it a contributor? Here is what my source says; Many people think if they skip a meal their body will use fat for fuel. Nothing could be further from the truth. When there is no food for fuel, the body holds onto fat and uses lean muscle tissue, which is a cleaner burning fuel for the body. Consequently, we loose muscle mass and become soft and spongy (exactly the word my 7 year old uses to describe my belly!). Going any longer than 3.5 hours between meals also causes blood sugars to drop which can lead to hypogylcaemia and in some cases, diabetes.

My snack stash!

To resolve this issue I now have a container of nuts at my desk, almond butter in the board room fridge and Mary's Cracker's in my drawer. Then I also bring fruit and/or veggies to snack on. As a result I am not getting the 3pm headache and I have more energy to do things at night. Even at the end of a stressful day I am still able to function.


Now I'm driving my family crazy calling food fuel and telling my 7 year old that she needs more protein in her lunch to help give her more energy during the day. To which she replied; "stop using grown up words, I don't know what that means!" 

Check the balance on the scale BEFORE you jump on...

So it is probably a very good thing that I did not get a chance to write yesterday, other wise it would have been a negative blog and I would not have found the scale incident so amusing. 
It was another challenging week at work. One of my responsibilities is HR and anyone in HR knows that when it rains in the HR world it pours. I cannot share the details of the issues I've been dealing with, but I can say that they have been time consuming and draining my energy. So by the time we got home last night I was ready to get on my PJ's and eat dinner in bed, however as a mom, that's not always possible. We had made plans to go to the park with a friend of Isabel's from school and her mom. Instead of PJ's I got a shower instead. 
Now I had consciously decided at the beginning of this Journey that I would not weigh myself throughout - only for the purpose of tracking and reporting my progress on a monthly (4 week) basis. But it had been two weeks, I've been so dedicated and I had sweat so much earlier in the day during my private with Renee, with that alone I should have dropped 5 lbs. So I decided to jump on the scale and boost my spirits only to find that the scale reported back, that I had GAINED 5 POUNDS!
I'm not entirely proud of what happened next, but bear in mind I was tired and stressed. I flopped down on the bed and started to cry. WTF, how could I have gained? NO change, I would have excepted, but gained? I let myself cry and feel sorry for myself for about 10 minutes. Sometimes you just need to cry it out. When 10 minute were up I got up and back to getting myself ready for the evening.
Then the pity turned to frustration. Stupid scale, why did I weigh myself...  there's no way, it couldn't be right... then back to the scale I went ready to prove it wrong. I really don't know how I was going to do that, until I looked down and saw that the needle without me on it was just past 5 lbs! Yes, I am embarrassed to say that once I rebalanced the scale I had actually LOST almost a pound! 
A great example of how hard we can be on ourselves! So I stopped to breath and regroup and reminded myself that this is a slow process. I am looking for long term results not a quick fix. I have definitely had more wins than losses over that last 2 weeks, even with work challenging me to deviate back to my old comfortable ways. 

Best laid plans...

I am not too pleased with my nutrition today. Not that I have made unhealthy choices, but I did not bring a lunch, I planned to buy my lunch today so that I would leave my desk and take a break. Well, that did not happen. Issues kept me at my desk until 2pm, so I have not eaten enough and my food options have not been very well balanced. This is frustrating because I had food in the fridge I could have brought.


I started off right - my vega shake, packed with everything I need to jumpstart my day in a healthy way.  At 10:30 I got out my Mary's Crackers and almond butter (which sat on my desk until 12). I've also had 2 Emergen-C Health and Energy booster drinks and a handful of mixed nuts. So I'm not exactly starving myself, but I am falling into an old habit of not eating enough during my day.


This day will not be marked as a failure, just a minor divination from my plans. 

IT'S NOT ABOUT THE NUMBERS

Last week I received a compliment from one of our clients at Create Balance. She said that I did not look like I had 40 lbs to loose. I really appreciated that comment, 'cause when I see myself in pictures I think I could stand to loose a whole lot more than that. But it is not about the numbers, what the scale says or the measurements Collette took to track my progress. For me it is about feeling better,  being able to wear the styles and clothes I want and liking the way I look good in our family photos.


Currently I weigh 160 lbs and I am only 5'2". My ideal weight for my age, height and frame is between 108 and 136 lbs. So dropping 40 would bring right in the middle. I'm not weighing myself, I'm going by how my clothes are fitting and how I am feeling. I'm not interested in dropping that 40 lbs in record time. That's why I'm not following a strict diet or killing myself with strenuous exercise plan. Slow and stead wins the race, I am making this change part of my life style, which is setting me up for long term success.  


Thanks again to all who are supporting me - especially to those who are reading my blog. Knowing you are out there checking in, is keeping me motivated!! <3

Krista Dolbear is a Registered
Holistic Nutritionist, Stott
Pilate's Instructor, and Certified Can Fit Pro
Personal Trainer.
To learn more about the services Krista
 offers, visit her website at:
http://www.welcomechange.ca/index.html

9 CONTRIBUTORs TO WEIGHT GAIN

1. Stress 
2. Genetics
3. Skipping Meals
4. Food Choices
5. Metabolic Weight
6. Liver Dysfunction
7. Hormones
8. Lack of Exercise
9. Medications

What you eat and don't eat makes such a big difference in how you feel and look. We all know how to eat well, but with all of the distractions and connivence foods it is hard to keep to a well balance food plan or even know if you are getting enough of the foods your body needs. 

When Krista completed her 6 page evaluation of me to determine what my body needed, the results were not surprising and her recommendations were not difficult to embrace. I started introducing a few of the main recommendations each week. We're at 2 weeks now and I am really noticing a difference with my energy levels. I am not where I could be with my nutrition, however like Krista says, "small changes to make a big difference". I am definately on my way!!

Friends and great food, makes for a
great way to spend a Saturday night!

It's about heathy choices, not sacrificing!


So this week I added 3 Pilate's classes and 1 Private session. I am happy to report that I have not deviated from my goals for this week with making healthier food choices. 
Saturday we had a great time with friends at Dave & Renee's for a BBQ. Making healthy choices was not difficult. I had a full plate of food and a lovely glass of red wine. I finished feeling content and guilt free. No heavy, full feeling and felt very comfortable having one of the small bit size desserts, a peanut butter square with chocolate on top.
Sunday morning I headed out to Megan's 9:30am Mat/Reformer class and felt great! I must say that this new life style is becoming addictive. I want to eat well and exercise. Even when I got McDonald's for my daughter, I did not even take a fry!! That is progress!!